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October 2009 
indelicate balance
Posted on Nov 20th, 2008
by 
maze
maze
Pure decadence. Improper balance. Can I tell you what I'm doing tonight. Should I or must I? Would it spoil the fun? What fun and whose fun? Hoosegow. Too much fun can get you into a load of trouble. Truth is I'm searching. I'm tired and I'm looking for a word that will trigger a chain of words that may end up becoming a blog. I've got a few hoosegow stories, but I'd rather talk about butter tonight. This is my confession: I've never felt comfortable with margarine. I could always cozy up to lard, but I've always had this thing about margarine. Margarine always left a funny after taste in my mouth. Even when they named it "I can't believe it's not butter," I thought....how stupid am I not to believe it's not butter...after all.... don't I even trust my own after taste. I think a lot of legislation has been passed throughout the years for a little more truth in advertising. I would love to go into a supermarket one day and see a plastic container with these words printed on it: "this is not fucking butter." I would enjoy such honesty, but then, my next question would be....well, what the fuck is it. I would then try to read the small print on the container which is generally impossible for me to read under the best lighting conditions and I would attempt to determine if this product that I was about to place into my cart was really safe for human consumption. Excuse me, could you please help me. With what? I can't read the last few words on these ingredients. It says: all natural 10/35 motor oil. And then I may think, a buck seventy-nine is not all that bad of a price considering the price of oil these days...and then think...whoa, what if this is the oil that they already took out of cars after oil changes, and then think..what the fuck are you thinking...none of this shit should matter...it's the taste of butter that you love the most. And then, I would start to look for some fresh bread that didn't smell like the stuff that drips on my driveway. Of course I'm exaggerating the moo versus vroom of my imagination. Whose gow is it anyway? Wow, I can't believe I'm doing this with our language tonight.
409 by the Beach Boys -- Chevorlet Muscle Cars
Access: Public
Did you know? Margarine is one molecule away from being plastic.
And Becel margarine Light was almost 50% water. I phoned them about this.
There was not less fat in it, just more water whipped into it. I asked them, “why would I buy this when it is 1/2 water and the same price as the other”.
My friend wouldn't believe me. Becel whipped the marg up so it had greater VOLUME, so that if you used 1 tsp, you only got less fat, because there was more water. I did hear that they withdrew Light Becel off the market, here in Canada for sure.
PS – you can leave margarine out on the counter forever, or on a window sill and no bugs will go in it. Nothing will happen to it, because it is almost plastic.
I only use butter.
That's what I think about sex…nothing is fucking better. Oh, you were talking about BUTTER! ….My bad. (*snort)
A lifetime of margarine killed my mother. Destroyed her liver. Bad stuff. Poison. Had to be the plastic er Margarine cause she never drank alcohol. How could “they” convince us that natural (animal fat) is bad and artificial (one molecule off plastic) is good for our bodies.
Fucking Margarine. I wouldn't eve use it as an intimate lubricant.
“…that is not fucking butter.”
Yes, that's it. Butter doesn't fuck. At least I've not seen it do that. Margarine is transfats. Each margarine fat molecule has extra hydrogens jammed into it, in ways that would not happen naturally in nature. What comes to mind as an analogy (not to be anal) is boobs. Transfat molecules are like Victoria's Secret bras crammed with silicone-enhanced boobs. Those extra “H”s help the transfat molecules stay perky. We could also say that the extra “H”s help them stay rigid, but that would be a different analogy. Same basic effect, though. As Mimi says, it's sorta like eating plastic. Butter is better because there are less “H”s. Butter is like natural breast tissue. :)
And I have found that the proper buttering up usually works.
Since I am not an expert on some of the other comments here…LOL!!!… My first thought was to reply as I read this post that I have not eaten margarine since I read many years ago that it is one molecule away from plastic...
then came the Internet and I read that that statement is a myth…
I still believe that it is man made and one molecule away from plastic…
I also read that autopsies on the brains of those with the big “A” showed substances in the convolutions of the brain tissue that resembled silly putty that was the by product of the “foods” that we eat that really are not foods, but we have been told that they are edible and therefore, they are food and we ate them.
So, I guess in that regard you could say that we have been screwed or as you put it, Maze, “fucked”! I also read that that is an acronym for “fornication under consent of king” but then I read that was also a myth.
So, guess we best stay plugged into our Higher Consciousness if we hope to ever know the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth about anything!!!
There you have it. My Scorpio self has spoken and I am sure that no one is the wiser for it…
Have a great weekend and remember, Maze, we all love you and you open the way for interaction on Gaia that I see on very few blogs.
Much Love,
Starseed
“fornication under consent of the king” Yup, so they say;-)
Buttah is bettah is all I can say.
Cozy up to lard? Coat me in butter;-)